PSA for Expectant Fathers

Posted on December 11, 2013 by playinghousewi

To all expectant fathers…

Today’s post is my version of a Public Service Announcement (PSA) for all you spouses of pregnant mommas. If you don’t make it through all 10 tips, here’s the moral of the story: Your special lady literally has a person growing inside of her, which makes her pretty damn spectacular. A living miracle. A total blessing. Treat her as such.

Tip #1: Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not happening

Take the time to read about the endless changes going on in your wife’s body and about the miraculous developments of your sweet little growing baby. While the Internet is vast and this task might feel overwhelming, BabyCenter.com has simplified the searching. Just make an account, type in your wife’s due date and voila! You will receive an email every week providing an update on the latest and greatest information regarding both your wife and baby. As a little bonus, try beating your wife to the punch… “Honey, our baby no longer has webbed feet or hands this week! How crazy is that? I also read that you might be extra tired these next few weeks… how are you feeling?” This leads me to Tip #2.

Tip #2: Ask how she’s feeling, then listen and sympathize

It seems so simple, but showing concern for your baby momma can go a long way. It not only shows that you’re thinking of her, but also shows that you recognize and understand the great task she has taken on. Carrying a baby is much more than just weird cravings and excessive weight gain. It effects every aspect of her life… what she looks like, activities she can participate in, things she can eat or drink, how she feels – imagine 3 months of the stomach flu or 9 months of feeling like you just ate a full pot of chili or having your boobs feel like they’re painfully pulling down your entire body. While it’s amazing, it’s also very difficult and it will likely make it easier if she feels like you’re with her, supporting her through it all. And really, just listening when she vents.

Tip #3: Treat her pregnancy like it’s 9 months of Valentine’s Day

To say that pregnancy can make a woman feel (more) insecure, ugly, fat, crazy, insecure, uncomfortable, unsteady, insecure, and so on would be a total understatement. And what better way to reinforce your love and appreciation for your lady than by making her feel like a queen? I’m not implying that you should bring a dozen long-stem red roses home every day for the next 9 months, but you should try to beef up the romance. Surprise her with dinner, write her a sweet card and send it to her at work, bring her home her favorite magazine, tell her she’s beautiful (and mean it), give her a massage, let her stay on the couch all night while you take care of dinner and clean-up, tell her you missed her. Whether it’s a big or small gesture, the important part is that it’s something. She deserves to feel special.

Tip #4: Do the things you say you’re going to do without her having to remind you

When it takes multiple reminders for you to get things done, you’re not actually relieving that much stress from your special lady. It’s always said that a pregnant woman shouldn’t stress and it cannot be STRESSED enough how important that is. Stress can cause brain and developmental damage to a growing fetus, not to mention pre-term labor and low birth weights. Stress is no joke, so don’t make her worry about whether you’ve gotten your shit done.

Tip #5: While you’re at it, take on some additional tasks

Whether it’s laundry or grocery shopping or cooking some meals, be proactive and help relieve some of the weight and responsibility from your gal. And don’t be afraid to ask the simple question, “What can I do to help you?” Among the many symptoms of pregnancy is severe exhaustion. Like, suffering from the flu, can’t move your body kind of tired. Give her a little relief, as her normal work-load is likely not as easy as it used to be.

Tip #6: Pick up the phone

If she calls, answer the phone. This will become more important as she gets closer to her due date, but it is also just a simple way to show her that she is a priority. Again, pregnancy is a sensitive time for a woman and it is most likely that she feels what she has to tell you is of the highest priority. Plus, if you don’t answer, she is flooded with questions like, “What’s going to happen when my water breaks and I’m all alone? Am I not going to be able to get a hold of him?” Note: This also means that you should keep your cell phone charged.

Tip #7: Be forgiving

Whether you think pregnant women use hormones as an excuse to be crazy or not, I will assure you, the only sustainable option for you is to get over it. Mood swings are very real and very uncontrollable and if you don’t watch it, one will punch you right in the nose and knock you on your ass. When this happens, brush it off and let it go. Your role is to be the cheery, happy and supportive husband. That might mean a few bloody noses (figuratively speaking) during the 9-month period, but it’s nothing you can’t recover from. Trust that it will only get worse if you try to fight it.

Tip #8: Take her on a date

Remember… 9 months of Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t have to be some epic event… just dinner for the two of you at a new restaurant, or a walk in the park. A nice, planned event for the two of you.

Tip #9: Make her feel sexy

Between the weight gain, the zits and the bloat, there is very little to feel sexy about during pregnancy. Remind her of how beautiful she is, hold her hand, give her sweet kisses. You know how to make a woman feel sexy… just don’t forget to actually do it. If you want a sex life, it’s essential.

Tip #10: Just be happy and excited

Remember that you and your baby momma are experiencing a true miracle together. Keep that in your mind every day and remind your partner of that. Fantasize about the sweet little hands you’ll soon be kissing. Ask your partner fun questions about your future life. And most importantly, be positive, happy and excited.

First Doctor’s Visit in One Week… and Counting

Posted on October 29, 2013 by playinghousewi

One week from tomorrow, November 6th, is my first doctor’s appointment. I can honestly say that I have never been more ready, anxious and excited to go to the doctor… EVER. Everyone tells you to relax and to not over think things, but really, it’s not 100% possible. For the most part, I go through my days happily and without worry; however, without fail, my mind seems to wander to that scary place at least once a day.

This morning it started pretty early… 5:45 am to be exact. I was straightening my hair and found myself googling, “would I know if my baby’s heart stopped beating – first trimester,” on my phone. Like I’ve mentioned, this week I’ve felt pretty darn good. I’ve had little bouts of symptoms – nausea, headache, heartburn, emotion overflow, exhaustion – but nothing that really changes my step. As much as I’m grateful for feeling great, I’m also longing for some gut-wrenching vomiting. No, I do not enjoy vomitting, but I did read that momma-to-be’s who throw up are way less likely to miscarry. I’d for sure take some barfing to ensure our little baby is going to stay with us.

So, back to my googling and what I learned… Pretty much nothing. As with most pregnancy-related things, it’s different for all women. Some people will experience the same symptoms of a miscarriage if their baby’s heart stops beating… however, this could take days for some women and months for others. Some people don’t. So I guess I just have to wait for my appointment to make sure everything is going well.

Which actually has me thinking… I hope they’ll do an ultrasound at this visit. All I know is that it’s 1.5 hours and I’m not seeing the doctor.

Does anyone know what this appointment consists of?

Symptoms

Sheesh… can you tell I’ve been in “a mood” this week? For some reason, I’ve been super gloomy the past few days. I’ve been pretty happy when I’m home, but not so much when I’m at work. I feel very tired and worn out and could use a little break. Maybe this weekend I’ll be able to get a little R&R. That might help.

On the positive, I did in fact work out last night! And actually, despite the fact that I felt so tired on my way over, I had a great workout. I go to a place called 9rounds, and absolutely love it. It’s a 30-minute, kickboxing circuit workout. I let them know that I’m in the early stage of pregnancy and they were able to adjust my workout, which was great. And, even better, I’ve got sore arms to show for it. As much as muscle-soreness is a pain (literally), I kind of love it. It’s nice proof that you did in fact work your bod. I’m going to try and make it again tonight.

I was supposed to head to a friend’s for dinner after work, but she cancelled this am. Now, the night is mine! And, since I was the one who was making / bringing dinner, the hubs and I will be ready to go when I get home from the gym.

Goodbye Gummies, Hello Horse Pill

Posted on October 24, 2013 by playinghousewi

As I mentioned before, beginning a few months before my pregnancy and up until Monday, I was taking Target brand Gummy Prenatal Vitamins with the VitaFusion Prenatal DHA + Folic Acid supplement. I can’t remember exactly what prompted me to look further into vitamins (maybe a babycenter.com email), but either way, I got to Googling. Pretty quickly, I came across this list of suggested prenatal vitamin ingredients from WebMD:

After comparing my gummy vits to WebMD’s list, I discovered that my supplements were falling short. There was no iron whatsoever in them and other values were too low. This prompted further Googling and the eventual purchase of Rainbow Light Prenatal One Multi Tablet and Oceans Mom Prenatal DHA from the Vitamin Shoppe.

Here’s my reasoning…

Rainbow Light Prenatal One Multi Tablet

PROs:

All requirements are met or exceeded
All ingredients are 100% natural
Only one pill per day (some vitamins required up to 6 per day!)
Rainbow Light is a well-reviewed brand
When I went to the Vitamin Shoppe, the guy confirmed my research – this brand is the most purchased at the store for Prenatals

CONs:

The pill is GIANT – make sure to take it during a time when you’re not feeling like you want to throw up… because this thing is big and smells funny.

Oceans Mom Prenatal DHA

PROs:

There weren’t a lot of options for DHA supplements, which are essentially Omega 3’s, so this choice was pretty simple.

CONs:

As with all fishy Omega 3’s, this thing smells like shit. The box says something about a “yummy strawberry flavor,” but I’m calling bluff. Just toss it in and knock it back.

As of now, I’m happy with my vitamin choices. However, I must mention that the first day I took the new vitamins, I was super shocked to see that my pee looked radioactive. I almost had to Google, “why is my pee so yellow pregnant.” (FYI: that’s my Googling technique… question and throw in the word pregnant.) Thankfully, before I could worry too much, I remembered I had switched vitamins and knew that this was just my body’s way of releasing the unneeded nutrients.

So, at this point, everything seems to be working and I’ve actually been feeling great. Maybe my new vitamins are part of my recent chipperness? Or maybe it’s just because I’m pregnant and beyond excited! Either or…

Symptoms

I’ve been feeling pretty darn great lately. I think I’m getting used to the faint nausea and it’s not really bothering me so much anymore. I’ve even been feeling way less bloated and way more myself – weight and everything is pretty normal. I’m guessing this has to do with the fact that I’ve been back to my normal diet which includes between 1200-1500 calories / day depending on exercise. (Yes, this seems low, but I am 5′ nothing. I’ve looked this number up and it is what it should be! Also, as an FYI, turns out you don’t actually get to “eat for two” when you’re pregnant. More like, increase your diet by 300 calories starting in your second trimester – sometimes first depending on your current weight situation. Google: “how much should I eat when pregnant” or check out this link from WebMD)

Last night after work – on my way to my bi-weekly mani with my mom and sister – I was feeling so uncomfortable. I wish I could have videoed the ride because I was literally using the automatic seat decline to move up and down for about 15 minutes, trying to find a comfortable position. I wasn’t crampy or anything… just achy and uncomfortable. I think the discomfort was mostly in my lower back. Again, it wasn’t pain at all… just couldn’t find a comfortable position. Thankfully, the joy of mani-time distracted me from any and all discomfort.

In terms of sleep, I became exhausted around 8 pm. Finally, just before 9, I had to call it quits. I collapsed in bed, and slept decently well. I turned on a few songs to fall asleep to and only remember hearing about 15 seconds of one. I woke up at around 1 to go to the bathroom and then I was out of bed around 5:45. All in all, pretty successful. Although I will say, I notice I’m not sleeping in the same way anymore. I’m a total back-sleeper normally and actually sometimes cross my arms over my chest to take full mummy form and then lay still for the complete duration of my sleep. This is not my reality anymore. I am constantly tossing and turning… from my back to my side and even onto my stomach, searching for a comfortable position. I think I’m going to do some research and invest in a pregnancy pillow. I feel like I want to be in a cocoon of pillow, totally nestled in. Keep you posted on any purchases.

Lastly, this morning I woke up feeling insecure about the fact that I’ve been feeling so great. Does feeling great equate to something happening (or not happening) to the baby? Or should I just relax and enjoy it while it lasts?

Baby on Board

Posted on October 17, 2013 by playinghousewi

Today marks 7 months of marriage with my amazing husband and the day we officially found out I am pregnant. I stress the word officially, because literally since September 27^th (just one or two days after ovulation), I have had an inkling that I was pregnant. So much so, that today’s positive HPT (mommy-to-be code for Home Pregnancy Test) was the tenth test I’ve taken in the past three weeks. And actually, I was conveniently at the doctor yesterday for my flu shot, begging her to take a pregnancy blood test so I could stop obsessing. She denied my request.

So, this morning – my 7th day sans period – I decided to take another test and this time, confirmation!! Being that this was our first month of “not trying not to get pregnant” (or whatever we called it), I don’t know if I’m really that in-tune with my body or if I was searching for signs. Either way, today I can say with confidence that I’m pregnant!

Telling the Husband…

Breaking the news to the daddy-to-be!

This morning began the way many of my mornings had recently… I got up early, ran to the bathroom to pee on that magical stick and waited. Of course, this meant pretending I was patient, putting the stick on the other side of the counter while I brushed my teeth… sneaking a peek every 15 of so seconds. THEN… it happened. What I had been waiting to happen for the last 9 tests. The second line appeared. Lightly, but it was there! I can’t even explain how I felt… relieved, excited, and whatever the emotion is that’s paired with the, “Holy shit” reaction. I was definitely feeling that.

Now was the fun part: surprising my husband! So, as I had planned over the past three weeks, I took our little framed, “I Love You Because…” sign and finished the sentence with… “you’re going to be an amazing dad.” Then, I propped the pee stick up against the frame and put it by my husband’s sink and waited patiently for him to drag his butt out of bed.

Finally, 45 minutes or so later, he emerged. I hid my smile and continued getting ready as my husband came into the bathroom. He immediately went to the toilet and, mid-pee, noticed my reveal. With the stream still flowing, he grinned and said, “REALLY?? Come in for a hug!!” So, almost as magically and even more “actual real life” than I had planned, my husband and I hugged and celebrated the little baby we were brewing to the bitter smell of his morning pee.

The Symptoms

The first few days after ovulation, I was absolutely brain-dead. I have a tendency to be a little ditzy, but I was operating at a level of pure ridiculousness. From forgetting to set a timer while cooking (3 times in one cooking session), to getting on the highway going the wrong direction on my daily drive to work, to literally pouring my bowl of soup all down the front of my shirt, I just wasn’t “feeling myself.”

Thankfully, the utter brain-dead feeling only lasted 3 or so days… although I’m still waiting to regain my motivation at work. The next big thing I noticed was my bionic sense of smell. I was on the other side of the basement from the litter box and still had to speed steam my shirt while holding my breath before RUNNING upstairs for fresh air.

The other big (and fun) ones were the headaches and serious bloating. I tend to get headaches quite often, so at least I’m used to that. But the bloating… Yikes. By the end of every day, my stomach is rivaling Buddah’s.

But honestly, nothing is unmanageable. And actually, now that I have that blessed positive test, it all feels great. I cannot even begin to explain how frustrating it is to have a gut feeling about something, signs that support your gut feeling, a period that’s 7 days late, and a test that says it’s all in your head.

So now that I can put that behind me, I’ve found my incapable-of-chilling-the-f-out brain obsessing over my next hurdle… will I be able to carry this little sesame seed through the first trimester?