Hem Jan 2018 3

My little buddy boy is having surgery tomorrow. It’s routine, but long, and requires general anesthesia. We’ve known about this procedure for awhile now, which clearly means that I have almost successfully been ignoring the impending date for months. With only hours left and pre-op prep beginning after nap, I’m anxious.

Hem Jan 2018I’m sure I’ve mentioned it – as if one wouldn’t guess it – but I’m an anxious person on a good day. Since having babies, said anxiety has hit borderline crazy person levels. So, I’m sure you can imagine the endless worry cycling through my mind. I keep wanting to tell myself, “you know that everything will be okay!” but do I? That’s where my head is at.

Hem Jan 2018 2

I would say that 100% my biggest anxiety is in the anesthesia. I just want everything to go smoothly. Things will be okay. Little buddy, my sweet love, will be okay and this time tomorrow, we will hopefully be on our way back home. Easy peasy. Done and done.

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Still, I’m walking around as if constantly on the verge of panic or an emotional breakdown. Tight, tight chest. Totally useless mind. Constantly fidgeting body. Fighting tears. The good stuff. And, somehow it’s only 2pm.

Hem Dec 2017

If you’re in my inner circle, I love you, but don’t want to discuss aforementioned crazy thoughts. Just need to get a little weight off my heavy chest. And, rest assured, if Henry wakes early from his nap, he and I will be leaving work to get a yummy treat for him and a little retail therapy in for me.

Wish us luck, send us strength and keep us in your hearts. Thanks, all.