Okay, so yes, I teared up mid-belt-out, but no, it wasn’t because I’m a terrible singer… although I am. (And, as a side-note, it must be mentioned that the only person who appreciates my strange, off-key voice is my husband. He actually goes as far as saying he thinks I have a good voice.)
Lately, with all the developments going on with our little baby, I can’t help but feel incredibly lucky to be so close to our baby. I have decided that I am definitely feeling the baby kick. In fact, it seems that when I lay down to go to sleep, the baby tends to move around quite a bit. So last night, in my own little way, I played with our baby. The baby would kick or flutter or pop popcorn in a certain area and then I would put my warm hand on the corresponding area on my belly. Then I’d let go and he or she would flutter in a different area, so I’d put my hand there. The game continued for a few minutes and it just felt so special.
I know my husband is super excited to feel the baby move as well, so I didn’t say anything to him, as not to rub it in. I just quietly interacted with my sweet little baby. Now, who knows if the babe was really “interacting” with me, but in my mind, he or she was.
So why the overemotional singing session? As I was singing some poppy ballad, I couldn’t help but think about the fact that our sweet nugget was hearing me, learning my voice, and learning to love my tone-deaf melodies just like my husband does. It again felt so special. As the mom, I am blessed with this deep-rooted connection with our baby before he or she ever gets to experience the outside world. I get to feel his or her movements and keep him or her warm and safe. I get to be closer to my baby physically than I will ever be in our lives. I get to literally sustain my baby… keep him or her alive through my life. It’s just so amazing. Such a miracle.
And even more exciting is the fact that every day, our baby is hearing me, learning my voice, finding comfort in the rhythm of my heart or the warmth of my hand. Essentially, we are falling in love and building this bond before we ever get to meet face-to-face. What an amazing opportunity. What a gift.
It reminds me that no matter how excited I am to kiss those sweet little fingers and toes, I have to soak in every moment of this magical time with our baby. I have to refrain from looking forward and enjoy today. Another day of pure, untainted Mommy/Baby time.
Falling in love with my sweet baby.